this all happened before 8:30 am

This morning on my way to work a man apologized to me for being black.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I was almost to my internship when I noticed a man who looked terribly upset walking toward me. As we approached one another, he said "excuse me, miss" and I prepared myself for a typical encounter with someone on the street in Uptown; the same kind I've been having since arriving here in August and the kind that I know exactly how to handle.

But this man wasn't the same.

As he began he said, "I'm sorry that I'm black and you're a beautiful white woman. I know you're not racist...but people are tired of helpin' out black guys... you see.. I wouldn't ask..but my mom just died and I really need to get to Rockford. I'm sorry to ask, but can you please help me?" 

Heartbreak.

There is no need for this man to apologize for being black, but people's actions teach him that there is. There is no need for this man to apologize for being black, but society tells him that there is. There is no need for this man to apologize for being black, but he's been taught that's what 'someone like me' would need to hear to lend him a hand.

Heartbreak.

And what is my roll in this as a white woman? What can I do to stop this madness? to prevent another generation from feeling like this man feels? to make sure that our society reflects the fact that we're all children of God?

I didn't have anything to hand to this man on the street today, but I could have told him he didn't need to apologize for being black. I should have told him that, but full of shock and overflowing with emotions, I bumbled through the interaction like someone who has never even seen a homeless person before. I staggered and stammered and apologized for not having anything to offer. When I finally got inside to my desk, I sat down and stared at my blank computer screen. How did that happen? How did I handle that so so sooo poorly? How am I so shockable? After a few minutes passed, I went back outside to look for the man, but he was gone.

Instead of going directly back to my desk, I crossed the street to get a drink from the corner store. I picked up a bottle of juice and walked to the front of the store to checkout. As I did this, a man in a wheelchair entered the store and selected a drink from the cooler. I put my juice on the counter only to find that the owner of the store wouldn't accept my card because my juice was only $1. Not wanting anything else, I asked the man if I could buy his drink for him. He agreed and I admit, I happily thought 'at least I can do one helpful thing today.' But as fate would have it, I misunderstood the owner. $2 was still not enough for me to use my card. I needed a total of $8 to use my card. As I stood in the corner store cashless and defeated in my experiences of the morning, the man in the wheelchair said, "How much is your drink? a dollar? Let me buy it for you. You were going to do it for me, so now I'm going to do it for you." This man, who I now know as my friend Bryan, had been panhandling down the street from the store. I noticed him when I entered the store. Instead of hoarding his money, he offered it to me - a girl lost in a morning of seeming defeats. Bryan reminded that we all need each another. Bryan and I are both Uptown residents so I'm sure I'll see him around again. I hope I get another chance to say thank you to him for buying my juice and even more, for lifting my spirits on a tough morning.

We need each other.

What the Bible Teaches about the Poor

This post is actually an essay - nerdy, right? Anyway, I really enjoyed thinking about, researching, and writing about this topic so I'm going to share what I came up with. I'm not a Biblical scholar, nor do I believe I have everything 100% correct, but I came closer to God through writing this and I hope that by reading it, you can do the same.

What the Bible Teaches about the Poor

            My first encounter with the poor occurred when I was just a toddler. During the Christmas season in 1992, my brother, sister, and I were too sick to visit Santa. Thus, in 1993, my mother and grandmother were absolutely determined to take my brother, sister, and me to see Santa. When the local newspaper ran an article inviting local children to visit Santa at East Elementary School, my grandmother, who read the article, immediately called my mother. They made plans; the Francis children were going to visit Santa! Little did these well-intentioned women know, this particular Santa visit was arranged to provide for needy families within our community. Upon arriving to see Santa with her three overly excited children, my mom realized that she had inadvertently taken us to an event that was intended to provide Christmas presents for families who could not afford to buy presents. Very embarrassed to be given panty hose, fruit, toothbrushes, and hand knitted hats and gloves, my mom tried to tell the individual in charge of the event that her children did not need to be given presents from Santa, she only wanted them to have a chance to sit on his lap. The event worker refused her attempt to prevent what my mom considered to be taking from families in need. The worker told my mom that there were enough presents for everyone and that we would be going home with gifts. My mom always reminds us that it was the best trip to see Santa any of us, including herself, ever had. We walked away from the event with arms full of recycled gifts and a mother who learned to receive.

            This story embodies several aspects of Biblical teaching about the poor. One of the most foundational of these teachings is the doctrine of imago dei, the idea that humans are made in the image of God. Imago dei carries with it the belief that because humans are made in the image of God, individuals have inherent and indisputable worth simply because they exist. This doctrine is based on Genesis 1:26-27, “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, in our likeness’…so God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” This verse bestows equality and value to every human being; to those who go to visit Santa to give presents and those who go to receive them. From this doctrine, we view and understand individuals as equals. In teachings about the poor, imago dei is a conviction that ensures that we refrain from paternalistic actions and instead, causes us to act with compassion as Henri Nowen describes in his book Compassion. Nowen says, “It [compassion] is not a bending toward the under-privileged from a privileged position; it is not a reaching out from on high to those who are less fortunate below; it is not a gesture of sympathy or pity for those who fail to make it on the upward pull. On the contrary, compassion means going directly to those people and places where suffering is most acute and building a home there.” Taken concurrently, imago dei informs and augments other Biblical teachings about the poor by maintaining neighborly or familial equality among human beings with no consideration of our economic statuses.

            Imago dei is not the only Biblical teaching that rejects paternalistic thoughts or actions. In Psalm 140:12, the writer says, “I know that the Lord secures justice for the poor and upholds the cause of the needy.” Similarly, Isaiah 41:17 says, “The poor and needy search for water, but there is none; tongues are parched with thirst. But I the Lord will answer them; I, the God of Israel will not forsake them” (emphasis added to both verses). Though Christians may be the hands and feet of Christ on earth, it is ultimately God Himself who is fighting for the poor and ‘securing justice’ for them. For this reason, a Biblical understanding of poverty includes a belief that because God is the one at work. We cannot boast of our own actions or view ourselves as bringing something to poor people that they would not have without us because we believe that God is the principle actor. This view of God also prevents burnout when living among the poor by reminding us that God is in control.

God not only acts on behalf of the poor, He identifies with the poor. In Proverbs, the writer says, “He who oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker, but whoever is kind to the needy honors God” (14:31) and Matthew’s gospel reminds us of Jesus’ words, “whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me” (25:40). Indisputably, the most significant identification of God with the poor is the example of Christ coming to earth to walk among humans. 2 Corinthians 8:9 announces, “For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for our sakes he became poor, so that through his poverty, you might become rich.” His richness was greater than we can comprehend, but that did not stop Him from moving into our neighborhood, make Him question if He could relate to us, wonder if He could fit into our culture, or place His safety above our needs. Christ moved into the most impoverished place in the universe to share his riches with us. This is the example our Lord sets for us. This is Biblical teaching about the poor and this as Jesus says in Luke 4:18 is ‘good news for the poor.’

In light of Christ’s example of identifying with, acting for, and working for the poor, what are those who are not poor to do? First, those who are not poor must recognize that poverty, be it physical poverty, spiritual poverty, or emotional poverty, is a force that opens our lives in an undefined, mysterious way that allows us to experience God differently. In the case of my mom mentioned earlier, her alignment with the poor allowed her to see receiving and God in a new way. In my experience, it is very difficult for me to encounter God when I am dwelling in my illusion of self-sufficiency; however, when I sense my own poverty, I comprehend my absolute and undeniable need for God. There is, perhaps, something sacred about recognizing our poverty. In Luke 6:20-21 Jesus says “Blessed are you who are poor for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied.” In verses 24-26, Jesus continues, “But woe to you who are rich for you have already received your comfort. Woe to you who are well fed now, for you will go hungry.” Jesus’ words to those who are rich seem harsh, but in reality, these words are full of grace. With these words, Jesus is graciously reminding the rich, ‘You are filling your life with a substitute. Be like the poor and you will become truly rich.’ Just as Jesus’ life serves as a blatant example of how we should live, Jesus’ words in Luke 6 demonstrate where true value lies. Jesus does not exclude the rich through His words, but allows His life to serve as an example of someone who was rich, but became poor.

As we consider what it means to become poor, we must also recognize that, according to the Law, it is the obligation of those who possess much to give to those who do not. Deuteronomy 26:12 says, “When you have finished setting aside a tenth of all your produce in the third year, the year of the tithe, you shall give it to the Levite, the alien, the fatherless, and the widow, so that they may eat in your towns and be satisfied” and Luke 3:11 says, “the man with two tunics should share with him who has none, and the one who has food should do the same.” The Bible is clear that if we possess abundance, it belongs to the poor and as “every good and perfect gift comes from above” (James 1:17) our possessions are not truly ours to give, they are God’s. If we are hesitant to sacrifice so much in order to love the poor as we love Christ, we should spend time dwelling on the provisions in the Law for the poor. As Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert suggest in their book When Helping Hurts, the commands concerning practices for dealing with the poor were intended to completely eradicate poverty. Deuteronomy 15:4 states, “There should be no poor among you.” This sentiment is echoed in the words of Luke about the idyllic Acts church. In Acts 4:34, Luke says, “There was no one needy among them.” This is one of the highest praises a group can receive in the Bible. As for the Law, it includes provisions for rest for the slave and the alien and a year for the poor to glean from the fields (Exodus 23:10-12 and Deuteronomy 15:1-18).  Both of these provisions occur through the observation of the Sabbath. Finally, the Law worked to eradicate poverty in daily life by commanding that individuals who are not poor include the poor in their tithes, allow the poor to glean the edges of their fields, and forgive the debts of debtors (Leviticus 25:35-38, Deuteronomy 14:28-29, Leviticus 18:9-10). In light of such provisions in the Law, God’s intended order for society, we absolutely must recognize that Biblical teaching about the poor commits us alleviating poverty.

Finally, Biblical teaching about the poor includes a mandate to work to change structures and systems that aggravate and worsen poverty. Nehemiah chapter five provides an example for us in fighting against the structural oppression of the poor. Nehemiah, the appointed governor of Judah, visited Jerusalem during the rebuilding of the temple wall. While he was in Jerusalem, the Jewish people told Nehemiah that they were “mortgaging their fields, vineyards, and homes to get grain during the famine” (5:3) and that they had to “borrow money to pay the king’s tax on their fields and vineyards” (5:4). Outraged by the government’s oppression and exploitation of the poor, Nehemiah used his power as governor of Judah to stand up to the other nobles and governors on behalf poor and by doing so, caused the nobles and governors to return to the poor what was rightfully theirs (5:6-13). The Bible provides this example of Nehemiah utilizing his position of power to oppose a corrupt system. In this vein, Biblical teaching about the poor calls us, today, to protest against, vote to eliminate, petition to change, and work to expose structural injustices such as inequality in education, injustice in the prison system, and exploitation of poor workers.

As my mother learned through our Santa visit, serving the poor and considering ourselves as equals with the poor by learning to receive alongside them can be two different things. Biblical teachings on imago dei, the role of God in bring about justice for the poor, God’s identification with the poor, the recognition of our personal poverty, our obligation to give to the poor, the mandates of the Law in eradicating poverty, and the example of Nehemiah in opposing structural injustice that affects the poor give us an obligation as Christians to follow the example of Christ when it comes to the poor. For each individual, mimicking Christ’s actions and living out God’s heart for the poor looks slightly different, but in every case, the poor should be viewed with dignity and respect. Finally, in serving the poor, we must remember that we are serving God Himself and in remembering this, give our very best out of whatever abundance He has granted us.

i am home

I moved to Chicago about 10 days ago. It has been a complete whirlwind. Wheaton in Chicago orientation, beginning an internship at Heartland Alliance Health Outreach, making new friendships, visiting old friends, planning a wedding... (the last one brings about a smile every time I think about it) 


I'm living in the Uptown neighborhood of Chicago. Uptown is a unique place with a very interesting history. This neighborhood began as a vacation spot for city dwellers and through various events that shaped the neighborhood, became home to many immigrants, homeless folks, and families. Uptown is now the most diverse neighborhood in all of Chicago (which arguably makes it one of the best neighborhoods for restaurant choices!) and is in the midst of transformation, for better or for worse. In addition to great food, Uptown's status as the most diverse neighborhood in Chicago creates a neighborhood in which I literally feel doesn't have an 'average citizen.' My neighbors are homeless. They are wealthy. They are immigrants. Their families have lived in the United States for generations. They work as cashiers and they work in investments. My neighbors’ lives represent an incredible variety of situations. I am not homogenous with the individuals and families in my neighborhood, but in the same way, the other individuals and families in my neighborhood are not homogenous with one another. I'm beginning to see that because of our heterogeneity, we can teach one another about the beauty of diversity. I'm also realizing that we are the same inasmuch as we belong to one another in this shared neighborhood. The new background of this blog is a picture of a mural in Uptown. The caption at the bottom is difficult to see, but sums up my experience in this neighborhood so far, "Uptown, where diversity brings success."


I feel blessed to have the opportunity to learn from this city - from Uptown, from my neighbors, from government systems, from the CTA... In every task of every day I am learning. Where should I buy groceries to help create and sustain jobs in my neighborhood? Where can I go that is safe? Who are the places in my neighborhood safe for? Who are they not safe for? What are the people at Heartland facing each day? What are the stories of the people who come through our doors? How do I live distinctly Christian in this urban environment? What opportunities does living in Uptown present for me to become more like Jesus?


10 days into my semester in the city, I have more questions than answers. Actually.. I have questions, but no answers. I come to this place as a person who needs to be taught. At the same time, I recognize that my story and my experiences create a capacity for me to give to this place and these people. This place is sometimes loud, sometimes crowded, sometimes dirty, sometimes gross. These people are strangers, they are different, they are not mine.


but


This place is beautiful, diverse, and welcoming and these people are neighbors, future friends, and mine.


If home is where the Lord sends us, I am home.

thinkin about these girls today

Ellen, Taylor, Erica, Val - roomie date in the cold temps

I can't stop thinking about my roommates today. I am so incredibly proud of all of them. Ellen just completed her summer selling books for Southwestern. Taylor is a chemistry genius, working in a lab doing things I could never dream of understanding. Erica is living and working in Lima, Peru with people she has come to love. All of them are living out the gospel. Knowing these girls, I see the way that God created them and equipped them for their summers. I'm thankful that as we begin our senior year we can rely on Him to continue to be faithful. I am so thankful to call them my friends. I love you & miss you apartyment women.

welcome

My pastor Mike is preaching a summer series on the book of Ruth. Yesterday he preached on chapter 2 verse 1-17. As he preached, I realized that Boaz accepting Ruth, the outsider, is a beautiful example of the way that Christians should live out our faith. Since my freshman year at Wheaton, I've been learning quite a bit about welcoming people in and becoming welcomed in. There are very specific events that I can point to that show God's work in this area of my life -- this story reminds me of those things. It makes me stop and remember the things the Lord has taught me and convicts me to actively pursue hospitality, reconciliation, and unity. I hope I can convey a little bit of that to you in this post.

Just to recap... At the surface, the book of Ruth is the story of a woman named Naomi. Naomi, her husband, and their two sons moved from Bethlehem to Moab during a famine. Bethlehem is translated as "house of bread" and is part of the holy nation of Israel. While Moabites were related to the Israelites, they were seen as vile and disgusting because of their practice of incest and worship of idols. Israelites were forbidden to marry Moabites; however, while in Moab, Naomi's sons married Moabite women. Tragically, the next thing the Bible tells us is that Naomi's husband and then her two sons died. As a widow living in a foreign land, Naomi had no one to support her. When she heard the famine in Bethlehem had ended, she returned to Bethlehem with her daughter-in-law, Naomi who refused to let Naomi return alone.  

As these women returned to Bethlehem, the crisis was severe. Naomi, a widow who went against the customs of her people when life became difficult, and Ruth, a widow from a vile nation, were helpless without the assistance of family members to care for them. The book of Ruth tells us that Naomi's deceased husband's family took them in. 

The next part of the story, is the aspect I find especially compelling. Israelite law requires that some of the crop must be left in the field to care for individuals like Naomi and Ruth. Utilizing this provision, Ruth went to a field to glean the extra crop so that they could eat. She gleaned the leftovers behind the hired workers in the field. While she was gleaning, the owner of the field, Boaz, came to the field and greeted his workers. He spoke to the overseer of the field and asked him who Ruth was. Despite her status as an outsider, or perhaps because of it, Boaz was very particular in the way he cared for Ruth. He instructed her to glean alongside the women that worked in his fields, welcomed her to drink his best water, told his men to not remove her from his fields, and at dinner, offered her the best of what he had, truly welcoming this outsider as an equal. Considering the cultural disagreements lying beneath the surface, the actions of Boaz are remarkable. Not only did Boaz care for Ruth's physical needs, he cared for her emotional needs for community and acceptance. What is more, Boaz instructed his workers in the way he wanted them to welcome and accept her.

¹⁵As she got up to glean, Boaz gave orders to his men, “Let her gather among the sheaves and don’t reprimand her. ¹⁶ Even pull out some stalks for her from the bundles and leave them for her to pick up, and don’t rebuke her.”

This verse is essentially Boaz saying, "Look guys, she may not do things the way that we do them, but don't make fun of her or yell at her for doing it incorrectly. Instead, make things a little easier for her to catch on to and don't give her a hard time about it in the process." 

Welcome, Ruth. Welcome, outsider. We're not going to make you feel bad for being different, we're going to embrace you and show you that we understand that you are equal. I can't help but think of my friends on HNGR and the way they've been accepted into communities across the globe. Welcome, student. Eat with us, live with us, worship with us, work with us, become one of us. Welcome.

Ruth is full of amazing truths, themes, and details that point to Christ. I believe that this is one of them. I believe that Christian hospitality doesn't exclusively mean accepting people from our culture who fit easily into our churches, workplaces, or homes. It means accepting the outsider, welcoming him or her to our table, making room for him or her in our workplaces, and providing community in our churches. I believe that I have a lot to learn and I am thankful for the mercy of God in the process.

Summary of my internship

For a summary of my internship, visit the link below. Working at FHC was a wonderful experience. I am so thankful that I was able to spend part of my summer there and learn from the wonderful people who work there. I can't wait until I can call a place like FHC my workplace! : )

http://wheaton.edu/Feature-Stories/Valerie-Francis

to my pops

The Francis Family in Ocean City, MD in fall of 1996.

Over the years I've noticed that my dad is the kind of person who attracts "strays." By strays, I mean people who don't really have a place to belong. For the longest time, I attributed that to chance or maybe to God putting them in his life in such a way that he couldn't get away from them, but I've been wrong about that. My dad doesn't attract people who need community, love, friendship, shelter, jobs, food, etc. My dad simply has eyes to see people that others forget, he has a heart to welcome people into his life, he has wisdom to discern how to help others in ways that teach them instead of making them dependent, and he has listening ears to hear people. I am so thankful to have a daddy who models that for me! 

I remember a weekend that my dad came to visit me during my sophomore year at Wheaton. It was a time in my life where things were turbulent in my romantic life and I needed guidance. The funny thing was, four of my closest friends were also at turbulent points in their romantic lives and they, too, needed some guidance. Without knowing what he was getting himself into, my dad took us all out for dessert at one of my favorite restaurants. As we sat in the antiquated, dimly lit room, the five of us devoured cheesecake and brownies while we leaked our confessions about our hearts to my dad. My dad didn't look at his watch over the hours we were there, he listen to us, advised us, and treated all five of us like his daughters. That's my dad.

I have a wonderful daddy. My dad is my biggest supporter and my loudest fan. He's also the first person to tell me if he thinks I'm making a mistake. He listens to me, prays for me, and counsels me. I am so thankful for his presence in my life.

I love you dad. Thanks for all that you have done over the years and all that you do for me every day, knowingly or unknowingly.

discrepancy

My internship has been amazing. I've truly become acquainted with community healthcare. I've done intake - taking vitals and putting people in rooms, I've shadowed doctors and nurse practitioners, and I've worked with the WIC program doing finger sticks to check iron levels and also measuring heights/weights. This week, I spent a day at an HIV clinic. It was amazing to see the relative normalcy of life to HIV patients when they are able to consistently take meds to keep their viral loads down! The doctor I shadowed literally told a new patient that once her viral loads were down, having HIV would be very similar to the way we think of diabetes care in the States. Half of me rejoiced when he said that and the other half of me felt enraged. I felt the weight of the injustice that was being played out before my eyes. Our poor live in comparative luxury. I know that even in the States everyone that needs medication doesn't have access to it, but it's so unfair that HIV patients in most of the world don't have the chance that HIV patients here are given to decrease their viral loads and live an essentially normal life. What I witnessed all day was truly comparable to a diabetes clinic - almost boring in the way that everyone was well controlled and simply needed refills for their meds so that they could stay that way, but at some point in the day I realized that I was witnessing a miracle. It's truly miraculous that it's possible to overcome HIV enough to thrive. We MUST share this with the rest of the world. We cannot keep this gift in our privileged hands, we must be intentional about finding ways to reach the majority world with the treatment they need.

written at my kitchen table

I left my hometown for college and moved hours away to a suburb of Chicago. Like many people, my first reaction to living in the suburbs was one of esteem. I loved the way that everything in the suburbs looked pristine and intentionally designed. style. In the suburbs, everything is presentable and pleasing to the eye
but
communities keep safe distances from one another. I know that this isn't always the case, but it seemed as if I never saw anyone get close enough to someone in need to welcome them into their group as family. At the very least, it wasn't the norm. As someone who grew up in a small town with lots of...character... the things I first admired about the suburbs quickly became the things that made (make) me feel confined. With time, I came to understand elegance as it is, a luxury. I became uncomfortable with the pattern of conformity and lack of unique qualities in buildings, inventories, and ideas. Although I may not have been able to articulate it at the time, these were the views that made my freshman self want to move back to my small town after graduating.

The more time I spent in the affluence of the western burb's of Chicago, the more I felt the weight of the needs of the community I grew up in. Our county has the highest unemployment rate in the state of Ohio. Over 15% of people in our county don't have any kind of medical insurance. The rates for coronary heart disease, high blood pressure, teen pregnancy, cancer, stroke, unintentional injury, and suicide are all higher than the average county in Ohio. These differential rates of occurrence are indicative of larger economic and resource discrepancies for people without jobs to apply for, who are far away from services they need, and without public transportation to move them closer to the resources that could help. As quoted in the book The Working Poor (David Shipler):

"It is not easy for men to rise whose qualities are thwarted by poverty." - Juvenal, Satires

For the last two years, God has used these injustices have compel me to long to move home after graduating from college; to use my education to give back to the community that raised and shaped me.

Lately, there have been a combination of factors feeding into my desire to return home after graduation from undergrad next May or following graduate programs or medical school in future years. I want to go home. I don't want to be a commuter-citizen, home for a few weekends here and there. I want to be committed, present, and helping to alleviate the burden we feel as a community. I also have a sense of simply wanting to return home - a place where I am well known and comfortable. I don't think that there's anything intrinsically wrong with that desire, but I also think if I stop there, at wanting to be home because it's comfortable, I lose what I feel I have been called to by God and I conform to the very thing that freaks me out in the suburbs. If I don't live with the intentionality of bringing the gospel through healthcare among the poor, I become the very thing I wanted to run from - a comfortable, distant, average life. What I was reminded of at the CCHF conference this weekend is that I could live in the same town doing similar tasks day-to-day, but if I don't do that with intentionality regarding what God has called me to, I might as well move to an island and lie by the ocean by myself every day.

The conference was great. You can find info about it here: http://cchf2.squarespace.com/

If you're interested in healthcare at all you should keep an eye out for next year's conference. I highly recommend it.

All in all, the conference was a great reminder that God calls us to faithfulness. I want to intentionally follow Him. I don't want to circle around the block or drop in for a visit. I want to move into the neighborhood and consider my neighbors my family because in doing this, I believe I will discover Christ in constantly deeper ways.

I wear cowgirl boots

For the last two days, I've been blessed to be a part of the Christian Community Health Fellowship (CCHF) conference in Nashville. This conference is a gathering of a fellowship of people who desire to share the gospel through healthcare among the poor. I feel so blessed to have stumbled across this community. It's incredible to be around such a huge number of people who are called to tbe same mission that I feel called to and even more, who are much father along on the journey and can advise me how to follow Christ. The men and women at this confere
nce are individuals I hope to emulate. Although their their careers sound like my dream job, that isn't what impresses me the most about them. I hope to emulate these people because they know what it is to follow and suffer for Christ. They have followed Christ into the lives of the poor and have countless stories of finding God and familial community in the least likely places. How beautiful God's redemption is, but not all of their stories conclude and fit into the nice neat package of what God has done. For many of them, the stories are about what God is still doing. They tell the stories of their clinics and their communities with faith, each story seemingly outlined by the phrase "so we prayed and God..."

There will be more to come about this conference as it has been wonderful. It has also been delightful to wander around Nashville with Mason and Anna - eating constantly and becoming the proud owners of cow people boots :)

Before I head to sleep, I want to share one of the biggest encouragments of tbe day. Tonight's plenary speaker was Sandra Post. Ms. Post lives in Philadelphia and exemplifies someone who embraces suffering to follow the call of God. When she spoke of how difficult life in her neighborhood can be, she said that even if she left the neighborhood, she would not stop suffering because the people in her community would still be suffering. They are her family. She couldn't be free from the weight of suffering if she knew they were in pain or danger. These people who were strangers only a few years before have become her people. That's beautiful. What is more, in the pain and struggle in her community, she finds assurance of the gospel because as she put it, the gospel is the only hope they have. Amen to that. As I anticipate doing Wheaton in Chicago in the fall, it was encouraging to hear the story of a sister in Christ who is finding God in a similar (but more permanent) situation. It reminded me of God's faithfulness and reignited my desire to live and work among the underserved of Chicago.

The gospel is the only hope we have, my friends.

the miracle of life

Today I witnessed the most powerful event I have ever seen. Emotionally, physically, and relationally, delivering a baby takes STRENGTH. If you are under the misconception that men are the stronger gender, watch a woman give birth. You'll get straightened out pretty quickly on that topic.

Before a baby is born, the mother s t r u g g l e s. She cries. She yells. She shudders. As soon as the baby is born, she is blissful. She loses sight of the inconceivable pain and delights in her prize. It's as if she has developed amnesia, forgetting the toiling, though it consumed her only moments before. I watched as three women gave birth today - one c-section and two natural births. Birth is absolutely the most beautiful and most disgusting thing I've ever seen. It is shocking, yet, strikingly natural, as every part works to achieve the goal for which it was created. All I can say is women of the world, you are unstoppable. And also, THANKS MOM! Even more, thank You, God, for designing us this way. There are no words to describe the beauty of what You have done.

To rewind, the last three days have been full. I started at the clinic on Monday and returned there on Tuesday, working full days both days.

On Monday, I worked with a friend of mine from high school who is a nurse. It was great to work with her because being the new person in a clinic is a little intimidating. She showed me the ropes and through her work, I learned thousands of tiny things about rural healthcare & healthcare in general. The biggest thing I learned on Monday was that a clinic will fail if it doesn't have good nurses. Nurses definitely keep the medical field running. Next time you see a nurse, thank him/her. The other thing I learned is that being an RN or LPN isn't for me. : )

On Tuesday I worked alongside a midwife (CNM). From 8:30 - 4:30, this midwife saw TWENTY SEVEN patients. It was amazing to observe her competence and ability to deduce information about the baby and the pregnancy with a few simple tests. She is not given much praise for her job, but she deserves all of our thanks. I have to say, if this profession is where I am called, I would consider helping women deliver their babies an absolute honor. At the end of the day, the CNM I was observing invited me to observe a delivery she had scheduled for the next day, which is what lead me to today's activities.

Along with the crazy experiences I've been having, I've been thinking about dignity and control of the tongue. The way a nurse obtains a history from a patient can show the patient respect, or it can belittle him/her. The way we talk about people we love can display that love fully, or create wounds we regret. The way a midwife explains a procedure to a patient can show care or haste. God does not delight in us trivializing or deprecating our brothers and sisters; part of fully loving our neighbors is being mindful of our words. I will confess that I am the chief of sinners when it comes to this. There will probably more to follow on my scattered thoughts about this topic.

Let's hear it for the women of the world!

the phototropic life, really valerie?

I am standing on the brink of an adventure. For the next three months, I'll be living in my rural hometown in Ohio, working at a community health clinic. For the three months that follow, I'll be living and working in Chicago in an urban health clinic. I am full of anticipation about both of these opportunities and want to keep a record of the way they make me think and grow. I also want my family & friends (near & far) to walk through this adventure with me. To do this, I'm becoming a blogger!

Naming a blog is a very tough thing to do. It's probably no surprise to anyone that I chose something nerdy and scientific... : ) As you probably already noticed, my blog is named the phototropic life and friend, you deserve an explanation.

phototropism |ˌfōtəˈtrōpizəm; fōˈtätrəˌpizəm|

noun Biology

the orientation of a plant or other organism in response to light toward the source of light 

even more basic explanation... when a plant detects a source of light, it grows toward it

Plants grow toward light so that they can survive. Phototropism is a natural survival instinct for plants. What would my life look like if I did this? I want to do this. My hope is that in the next six months, I will learn how to live a phototropic life. I want to orient myself so that I can grow toward the Light because I believe that growing toward the Light, becoming more like Christ, is what will allow me to survive.